Monday, November 15, 2004

Condi Rice, unqualified

From ABC, news breaks: Rice is going to be the next secretary of state. Her qualifications:

Born in Birmingham, Ala., Rice graduated from the University of Denver when she was just 19 years old. She went on to pursue her doctorate. In 1981 she began teaching at Stanford University, where she later served as provost.
Graduating from college at 19 is nice, I guess, but has she ever kill't a man with just a foots long length of piano wire? Sure book smarts are nice, but I expect more from our secretary of state, like, you know, a few confirmed kills. There was that one time where that reporter accidentally brushed his hand up against Ms. Rice’s behind after a press conference, but not only is that guy technically not “dead," but he can actually still recognize voices of loved ones and move some of his fingers (the ones that are left, natch).

Now, Rummy... man, he could kill a man with just one of his beady eyed, gritted teeth glares.

Or why not make a bid for bipartisanship and reconciliation and bring in John Kerry. He committed war crimes. Which nearly won my vote, except for the whole fecklessness thing. Oh, and according to the lefts interpretation of the exit polls, I'm also a homophobe that didn't want to see sodomites steal my marriages, because thats how small my mind is.

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