Monday, November 01, 2004

Oceanography book for sale: Slight scuff marks, some wrinkled pages, belligerent demeanor

Threatened by my Oceanography book:

Even with less severe waves, beach logs lying near the water’s edge have a dangerous potential. The unsuspecting vacationer sits or plays on such a log, and when the occasional higher wave rolls it over, the person may become trapped under the log and crushed or drowned by the succeeding waves. Logs in or near the surface represent a great danger for the unwary. Where are you safe? You must be the judge.
At this point, I slowly closed the book and backed away, avoiding eye-contact. Eventually it lost interest in me, and so I was spared, but not before I promised God I would build an orphanage in a third world country.

Promises made under duress don’t count, right? Right?

update: I'm at the library now, having ceded my room to my oceanography book (I managed to grab two unmatched socks and a pair of swimming shorts as I ran out, which should keep me until thanksgiving). Anyways, a friend emails these amusing extracts from an Engineering Physic II book (a class which sounds like it might be slightly more difficult than oceanography).
"...the magnetic fields of the electrons in certain materials add together to give a net magnetic field around the material. This is true for the material in permanent magnets (which is good, because they can then hold notes to a refrigerator door). In other materials, the magnetic fields of all the electrons cancel out, giving no net magnetic field surrounding the material. This is true for the material in your body (which is also good, because otherwise you might be slammed up against a refrigerator door every time you passed one)." --Chapter 29, Section 1

"This is an overhead view of a frog that is being levitated in a magnetic field produced by a current in a vertical solenoid below the frog. The solenoid's upward magnetic force on the frog balances the downward gravitation force on the frog. (The frog is not in discomfort; the sensation is like floating in water, which frogs like very much.) However, a frog is not magnetic (it would not, for example, stick to a refrigerator door).--Chapter 32, Introduction



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