Thursday, December 09, 2004

Global Warming

This sounds sensible:

Downing Street last night confirmed that the Prime Minister had held “lengthy discussions” with Mr Bush about a fresh initiative that would bypass Washington’s steadfast opposition to the Kyoto Protocol.

The deal, described by one source as “Kyoto-lite”, would involve scientific agreement on the scale and nature of the threat, as well as an international programme to develop the technology needed for renewable energy and the reduction of carbon emissions.

The first of the points is the most important: "scientific agreement on the scale and nature of the the threat." There's no denying, human influenced global warming is happening. The question is one of magnitude, and to what degree this should bother us in the present.

The apocolyptic holocaust of global warming is predicted to increase temperatures globally by... you ready for this?... 3.6 degrees fahrenheit by 2100. That's right, 3.6 degrees fahrenheit ... by 2100.

You might say "2100? Alright, I'll be dead by then! Rock on! Let's go light a pile of tires on fire!" But this doesn't comfort me. I find being comforted by my own death to cross the fine line between acceptable morbidity and an episode of Nip/Tuck.

Rather, the proper way to view this is "2100? We'll have flying cars, nanotechnology and robot wives by then! They can fix the problem."

Thing is, technology increases exponentially. Look at America in 1800 compared to America in 1900. Then compare America in 1900 to America in 2000. Technological advances happen quicker and knowledge is accumulated faster and more efficiently as time goes on. Advance builds on advance.

By 2050, I'd say we should have the tools to enact global climate change from a lab in NASA, with the push of a button. We are on the cusp of startling breakthroughs in nanotechnology, I think, and the ability to manipulate our world at the molecular level will allow for unprecendented control of... er... everything. Changing the composition of the atmosphere, to eliminate Greenhouse gases or whatnot, will be a minor application of what our scientific community will be capable of.

Now, I'm majoring in political SCIENCE, so I know what I'm talking about here. We can either impose damaging restrictions on our economy and make people suffer now to marginally slow down the rate of global warming, or we can have George Jetson send Rosy the Robot to inhale greenhouse gases and excrete it in the form of a tasty Italian dish. I know which one I'd prefer, but then again I've always had a thing for cavitini, especially cavitini crapped out by robot maids.

Everyone needs to just stop hyperventilating about the piddling nuisance of Global Warming. Our plan should be to do nussing, absolutely NUSSING!, about Global warming. We need to get inaction in action. We can't put off proscratination any longer. Or, as Carbon the Bear would say, "Only you can't prevent global warming."

Heed his warning. Or don't. Either way, whatever. Apathy is your friend, so, yunno, whatever.


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