Sunday, February 13, 2005

Internal Dialogue, Externalized: Episode 2

Myself: Are you sure “ironical” is a word. It sounds so… grating.

Me: Dude, it’s in the dictionary. End of story.

Myself: But, like, if “hedgepickle” was in the dictionary would that be a word?

Me: And like Socrates you cut to the pith of the situation. Congratulations, you have exposed my sophistry for what it is. That is, y’ know, sophistry. I commend you on your intellectual prowess; you have picked away the thin film of argumentation layered over my flawed assertion. You are a font of wisdom to my sinkhole of ignorance. I beseech your forgiveness.

Myself: Are you being sarcastical?

Me: Sarcastical isn’t a word, you frickin’ hedgepickle.

Myself: Hah! I told you it wasn’t a word! Score another one for me!

Me: You’re not Me; I’m Me. You’re Myself. And we were talking about ironical.

Myself: What were we talking about?

Me: Ironical.

Myself: What?

Me: Ironical.

Myself: Again, I couldn’t hear you.

Me: Ironical.

Myself: Still think it’s a word?

Me: The word has lost all meaning to me. And its so grating, y'know? What was Webster, like some monarch or something? Screw that, we live in a democracy, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to use ironical. Webster can shove it up his wordhole, I’m sticking with ironic.

Myself: Because there both adjectives y’ know? What’s the difference?

Me: Wait… their both adjectives? Wow, that’s like ironical.

Myself: I’m going to stop talking to you for a while if that’s okay with you.

Me: I was thinking the same thing.

update: Internal Dialogue, Externalized: Episode 2, Epilogue

Me: *cough* Hedgepickle *cough*

Myself: What was that?

Me: I thought you weren't talking to me.

Myself: Oh that's real mature. Grow up, will you?

Me: The rate at which I grow is determined by the uncontrollable flow of time. You know that, so why must you insult my maturity? Its not my fault. And, y'know, takes one to know one, so hah!


Post a Comment

<< Home